Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Attachment

Amy and I are, more or less, followers of the "Attachment Parenting" theory (found here). At least we are to the extent that we think it's a good idea to respond to the baby's needs rather than let her just sit there and cry, which seems (surprisingly to me) to be a parenting technique that many people follow. Attachment Parenting also tells you to carry or wear your baby as much as possible, and to have her sleep in your bed at night. We sort of have her in our bed, although actually in a co-sleeper attached to the bed (which is acceptable to Dr. Sears, the Attachment Guru), but lately I've been trying to let her sleep in her crib more and more. And we do carry her a lot, and Amy wears her in a sling sometimes, but we don't actually hold her anywhere near as much as Sears recommends.

This is because although we seem to think Attachment Parenting makes sense, Mookie has mixed feelings about it. Sometimes she insists on being held, but often she makes it clear that that's not what she wants. I try to tell her that she should let us hold her so that she will learn to trust us, but she often says, "Trust, schmust, I wanna swing in my swing." Or, "I want to lie on my baby gym with my bobo in my mouth. Sucking and staring at the mirror are a really cool combination, and much more fun than snuggling with my parents. So PUT ME DOWN!"

And today she is feeling gassy, so she really wants to be in her swing when she's not eating. It's really good that the swing relieves her gassiness, but it's a little hard on us because swinging seems to, um, generate all sorts of internal action. Sometimes all over the swing, in fact. But, it's better than a gassy, screaming baby, I think.

2 comments:

IrreverendAmy said...

Hey, the idea is to be responsive, not to hold a baby who doesn't want to be held at that moment.

On the other hand, the Sears recommend lots of holding/wearing during the day as a preventative to a wakeful baby at night, the idea being that she'll have gotten the snuggling she craves all day so she won't wake up looking for it. If the price of Mookie swinging from 6 to 9 p.m. is that she wants to be held and rocked from 3 to 6 a.m., we might need to start weaning her from the long swing sessions.

--the (tired) Udder Mudder

Anonymous said...

Those baby swings are, from what I've witnessed, an absolute nightmare because baby becomes addicted to them and cannot soothe herself to sleep as she MUST be rocked before nodding off. Do your over-tired selves a favour and wean Mookie off the damned thing, and then give it (the swing, not Mookie) to someone you don't really like. ;) Stu and I never had one and our babies fell asleep wherever and whenever, much to our relief.

Mary Ann